While cleaning out my old car that held more memories and road trips that I can count. I came across a spiral journal that I used while Justin was going through his shoulder surgery and recovery. I don't know if I can really put into words as to how much we went through and how it feels like a lifetime ago. We were kids then. Seriously. Kids. We got through some tough stuff. He was in so much pain and when we thought his pain would go away with a surgery, it was quickly turned into disappointment. Justin's shoulder joint had a horrible staph infection that required heavy antibiotics through a PIC line. 6-8 weeks. I'll never forget the look on his face in recovery when he heard he didn't have a new shoulder. We cried and couldn't believe what we were about to face.
Now to the journal I found in my car. I was reading through it. I had just finished college, I went to church with my girl friends every Sunday and I was trying to hold on to things that I could not understand. I have always been a believer that things happen for a reason and that God is always in control. He always has a plan. It was interesting to find some notes that I had written down from a book I was reading, "Why do bad things happen to good people?"
As I was reading it, it has brought back what we went through as such young adults and what we have had to overcome recently with our basement flooding and some other issues going on in the basement. We were strong then, we continue to be strong as a team, and we will continue to be strong because that was always God's plan for us. When times got tough, Justin and I showed our best. We could overcome so much together. We grew up on opposite ends of the US and yet we ended up together. Married. With 2 beautiful children. There was a reason. There was always a plan.
"Why do the Righteous suffer?"
"Everyone is troubled by the unfair distribution of suffering in the world. If we wait long enough, we believe, we will see the righteousness of God's plan emerge."
"He puts us to the test so that we will discover how strong and faithful we are."
"God sends such tests and afflictions only to people He knows are capable of handling them, so that they and others can learn the extent of their spiritual strength."
The psalmist writes. "I lift mine eyes to the hills; from where does my help come? My help comes from the Lord, maker of Heaven and Earth."
He does not say, My pain comes form the Lord. He says my help comes from the Lord.
I always admired Justin during all of his pain because he never once said why me? He always said, with his autoimmune disorder and shoulder issue, that he was going through this so that no one else had to. Especially a child. I had no words for him at that time. He truly was someone who was selfless during all this and I believe God's plan showed us how to have faith and to believe. Our life after that changed so much and without pain and suffering. It's like we got the bad stuff out of the way to make room for all the good.
I do believe we have been tested recently but God will not fail us, He hasn't in the past.
Love,
Jamie Lynne
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